Misunderstand

This week's work of fiction imagines the intimate life of one of this nation's foremost proponents of Orwellian euphemisms. Originally written in 2004, it has it all: bionics, cuddling, soap bubbles, and unfettered rage. (It should be noted that this episode includes adult themes and may induce nausea.)

Cleanse

This week’s stirring narration is provided by The Toothless Prospector, a great friend of the podcast. You won't want to miss this one.

Grab

I think we can all agree it's getting cramped in here, and mother's handbag digging into our shoulder is not helping.

Insist

In this episode, a younger version of yourself may only be hoping for a Nutella sandwich, but that doesn't mean you won't be going to prison.

Carry

Here's another story. Will it make you have feelings? Will it remind you of that time a parent explained something in unsatisfying terms? Are you afraid to listen to it? You shouldn't be. We promise.

Dance

This story has it all: dogs, prosthetics, mass executions, and constitutional law. Better yet, it can be consumed in the time it takes you to brush your teeth.